The FYYFF-ies - Week 39

Well, everyone is beating me to the punch. But that doesn't mean that I still can't give the award to one piece of human extrement.

This week's winner:



IRANIAN PRESIDENT MAHMOUD AHMADINEJAD (or that fuck from Iran, shown here one finger off from modeling the FYYFFie trophy)

I could ramble on, buy my darling friend Stephen says it best.

And there ya go....................

Bye Bye Bip

I was sad to hear about Marcel Marceau.

I was fortunate enough to see him perform twice. The man was a genius. I know that mimes get a bad rap, but that's because they all strived to be as great as Marcel.
They failed miserably.........yes, even Shields and Yarnell.........

But what truly blows my mind is that he was in this movie.

Sunday's Cartoons

So the two hour cartoon block debuted on Fox last night.

The Simpsons, King of the Hill, and Family Guy rolled out their stuff......and the evening got better as it went along.

It almost kills me to say that The Simpsons 19th season premiere was moderately funny at best. The King of the Hill was just slightly better. But Family Guy.....

...oohh Family Guy.....you were brilliant. B-R-I-L-L-fucking-I-A-N-T.

It was an hour-long Star Wars homage/parody. Stewie as Darth. Lois as Leia. Quagmire as C3PO and Cleveland as R2D2 with attitude. Every character was perfectly used. If it is repeated, WATCH IT IMMEDIATELY!!!!! If you know someone who Tivo'd it, steal it from them!!!!! It was perhaps the best hour of TV I've seen in a LONG LONG TIME (ago is a galaxy far far.......sorry, I couldn't resist.........)

The FYYFF-ies - Week 38

Goodness, I've been waiting for this all week.

The award goes to:




O. J. SIMPSON

Plain and simple.

I want this murdering jackass to go away.

He may be guilty of the robbery. He may not.

But I believe he killed people. And instead of playing golf, he should be "looking for the real murderer". Oh, wait................

Go play in traffic with your award, Juice.............

One Good Reason I Watched the Show.....

Not a lot of people probably remember Brett Somers. I used to laugh my ass off during Match Game when she and Richard Dawson or Charles Nelson Reilly would start acting silly and crack themselves up.

I sat one Christmas evening and watched 4 1/2 hours of Match Game on the Game Show Network. It was a perfect end to a great day.

Thanks for the laughs, my dear. You and Charles can get the big guy laughing now....

The FYYFF-ies - Week 37

Famous people are just like you and me. This is what some people say anyhow.

Allow me to present this week's award to someone who thinks he's better than all of us:



KANYE "KAN-GAY" WEST

First, let me address the gay rumors, because they dog our poor Kangay. If you didn't act like a fucking drama queen every time something didn't go your way, there probably wouldn't be these accusations. But I say if the tiara fits, and Kanye, it CLEARLY fits................

In any event, Ms. West got slighted AGAIN by MTV and launched into a backstage tirade (which of course was caught on tape). Wow, poor baby. Don't you have a Grammy or two or three? You do? Then do me a favor......SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!. It's MTV, for Chissakes. They probably don't play yours, or anyone else's, videos anyway.

Take your award. Go write something. Remember, George W. is the enemy, sweetie.....

RIP Ellie Punkay

She was a most unique individual. Chicago Theatre will miss her.
(sent by a few folks to me, written by David Heimann)

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Who is Ellie Punkay?

Well, most of us know her, because she was a determined veteran audience member of Chicago theater. She was a short woman, with a humped back, who was relatively poor. She loved the theater, and would volunteer at any theater company that would allow her to usher, in order that she could see the shows that many of us performed in.

Can't remember her?

Then you would definitely remember that she was the theater, who was the MOST generous, and LAUGHED at everything, with enthusiasm, even at shows that were bombing. More than one Green Room Discussion that I have had over the last several
years in Chicago has started with the words "Who is that loud lady in the third row?"

That was Ellie Punkay.

More than one performer recognized that she enjoyed the shows we performed a little too much.

She will now be watching us from a little bit farther from the third row, maybe the third light, I don't know.

I regret to pass along that she died last week from a heart attack and was found dead in her apartment.

She didn't keep a lot of close associations, so I don't know that the news has spread, but she is a woman who effected every one of us in the theater community of Chicago. Take a moment or two, if you will, and if you feel comfortable, to just remember her.

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David Cerda nails it on the head too......

I received a forwarded e-mail ... about the passing of Ellie Punkay. Ellie may not be a name you know but if you’re in Chicago theater you certainly would remember her as she was an audience staple of many a local production. Ellie attended every single Handbag show and some Sweetback shows as well. I believe she was also a member of the Chicago Saints. Ellie was hard to miss, because, although she was short in stature, and had trouble getting around due to a hunched back, she made her presence known in the theater with her unforgettable and mostly ill-timed laughter. She would throw me at first but once I knew she was out there I learned to appreciate her and I was glad to hear her laughter when sometimes there was none. Sometimes her laughter would generate other laughter and I think it helped give uptight audiences permission to laugh. I remember asking Steve Hickson, who is that woman? I got to the point where I would say ‘hello’ to her and exchange pleasantries and I marveled at her dedication to the local theater scene when I would see her waiting for the Belmont bus late night on the corner of Racine and Belmont after coming from a show at the Theatre Building or Bailiwick. At first I felt a bit sorry for her but then I realized that was my problem, not hers. She was doing exactly what she wanted to, and didn’t ask anybody to help her out, which is how I hope I can be when I’m elderly. Ellie was found in her apartment last week, dead from an apparent heart attack. You will be missed Ellie!

Taking FANATIC to a new level.......

Thank you to Eric for bringing this to my attention.

It is horrifying and hysterical at the same time.

Oh my....................

OH. MY. GOD. CUBED

So, after the show yesterday, we went to a castmate's home to watch the rest of the Bears game (BFD). I was under the impression we would be playing poker - this was the discussion a few weeks ago. This excited me. Halfway to the castmate's home and I realize we will be playing video games (SHIT). This did NOT excite me. After the Bears lost, the game was hooked up, but not just any video game............

GUITAR HERO.

OH. MY. GOD. (the joy)

I was HOOKED. I LOVE THIS GAME. I played bass lines to songs I knew. I played bass lines to songs I kinda knew. I played bass lines to songs I had NEVER heard. I am convinced I was a bass player in another life. I've always likes the bass line. BASSBASSBASSBASS.......I played until my arm started to cramp a bit and my fingers throbbed in pain. I think I may have found my calling.......

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There is a woman who works in my building. Every once in a while she will wear a pant suit that makes me think "It is really sad that a couch had to die for that outfit."

OH. MY. GOD. (don't stare cuz you'll laugh)

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I FINALLY went to the dentist. Not as bad as I thought it would be, but clearly not good. I now have a list of things that need to be done. I believe they need to be done, then I look at what it's going to cost and I think I might live with the pain. But no no no, I'll be an adult and go do it......goddamnit.

OH. MY. GOD. (ow, it still hurts)

The FYYFF-ies - Weeks 35 & 36

Okay, calm down.........the three of you that read this.

Let's hand out this week's FYYFFie and then catch up with last week's.

THIS WEEK'S:



GERRY AND KATE MCCANN

They claim repeatedly they had nothing to with the disappearance of their daughter Madeleine. The Portugal police have labeled them suspects. They had David Beckham rooting for them and had a meeting with the Pope for Christ's sake.

Things are looking a little fishy.

I want them to be innocent. Losing a child has to be amazingly painful. But if they did anything to her, there will be a line of people ready to shove this trophy so far up your asses the Pope won't even be able to save you.

And now let's catch up with the retarded senator

LAST WEEK'S WINNER:



SEN./EX. SEN./SEN./EX. SEN LARRY CRAIG

"Darlin' you've got to let me know.....should I stay or should I go...."

Everything that has come out of this man's mouth has been bullshit.

"I'm not gay, I just like the way they taste" - "I'm not gay, and so what if my wife has a strap-on?" - "I'm not gay, but my secret 'friend' Pablo is"

I LOVE LOVE LOVE when shit like this happens to Republicans. This guy should have his picture put in the dictionary next to the word WAFFLE.

Here's what I think, sir........you knew EXACTLY what you were doing. Stop lying and stop having your wife stand behind you in silent support. You got caught. Face the music and go away sir.

On the plus side, you have a new toy now......................

My Brain Has Been Sleeping

Wow, I've kinda been really tired and in a bitchy funk. I realize I didn't do my FYYFFie last week, but not to worry. I'll do last week's and this week's tomorrow. Alert the muthafuckin press......................

Thank you, Dr. Durr

The Department of Theatre mourns the loss of a long-time colleague and friend. Countless MSU students who knew and loved Dixie share our profound sense of loss. Our condolences go out to her mother and family. We leave Dixie's biographical sketch below, as she wrote it for the Department.

Professor Emerita of Dance, holds her Ph.D. from The Ohio State University; a M.A. in Theatre from Michigan State University; a MA in Anthropology of Human Movement from New York University; and a B.A. in Dance from Butler University. In addition, she is a Certified Teacher of Labanotation, and has earned an Advanced Certification in Labanotation from the Dance Notation Bureau in New York. In addition to her own choreography for the concert stage, she has reconstructed from Labanotated scores Charles Weidman's Flickers and Brahms Waltzes; Elizabeth Keen's Mini-Quilt; Judy Allen's In The Swing; and Doris Humphrey's Partita and Soaring. She has received special recognition for her choreography in Carousel, West Side Story, Cabaret, Guys and Dolls, Brigadoon, The Music Man, The Pirates of Penzance, My Fair Lady, A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Forum and The Mikado. Dr. Durr has served as a member of the Board of Directors of the Congress on Research in Dance (CORD). She continues to serve on the CORD Awards Committee. She has been a member of the Professional Advisory Committee to the Dance Notation Bureau, a member of the Board of Directors of the American Dance Guild, and President of the Michigan Dance Association from 1987-1989. The National Dance Association recognized her with a Presidential Citation in 1994. In 2004, she received a Lifetime Achievement Award from the Michigan Dance Council. She has published in the Journal For The Anthropological Study Of Human Movement, the Journal Of Physical Education, Recreation, And Dance, the Journal Of Aesthetic Education, the Dance Research Journal, and Educational Gerontology.

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Dixie passed Sunday from ovarian cancer.

The last conversation I had with Dixie was a week before the Jeff Awards. We had a wonderful conversation, and after I hung up the phone, I bawled like a baby.

She was one of the best.

All my love, Dr. Durr. You will be sorely missed.